Week 5 Predictions

Okay, didn't have time for last weeks predictions. I'm sure I would have picked all of them correctly, but that's in the past. Here are this week's predictions. I was going to do haiku, but that would be silly. It'll be quick shots.

Sherman Tanks vs. Waived & Confused
The Tanks are 3-1, but we all know they should be 4-0. Waived & Confused is 2-2, but we all know they should be 0-4. Can't really find a reason why Waived thinks they can beat the Tanks. After all, Peyton Manning is playing great, and it's still the regular season. Waived also has a little problem of injuries. Half the team has the comment "limited in practice, might play Sunday". Prediction: No way Waived wins this game.

Los Bastardos vs. No Talent Ass Clowns
Interesting case. The Clowns are 2-2 while the Bastards are 1-3, but the Bastards have outscored the Clowns by over 30 points. I figure Chris Johnson will do well against the Colts' shit defense, but Brian Westbrook faces and even worse Tampa defense. But I think in the end Tony Romo should have a statistically good game against KC for the Clowns. Prediction: Clowns take this one.

Dark Lords vs. Hellhounds
1-3 vs 0-4. Boring. Well, I hope Phil wins because I figure if he keeps losing, he'll stop changing his lineup in a couple of weeks. But Ben Roethlisberger is facing Detroit and he's throwing a lot. The Hounds have Carson Palmer who isn't so much. And facing Baltimore. But they do have Adrian Peterson against St. Louis which is good unless they get up early and rest him the entire second half. Prediction: I think the Dark Lords win this one.

Meat Curtains vs. Mooseknuckles
The game between perverted slang. Which is ironic because I think this game comes down to a pussy - Eli Manning. I think Meat Curtains will win if he plays against Oakland, but they'll lose if Tom Brady has to be put in against Denver. Prediction: I bet Manning sits out so Mooseknuckles win.

They Might Be Dave vs. Spooner St. Sporks
The only undefeated team versus the highest scoring team. But the Sporks have slipped in the past couple of weeks. It didn't help that Drew Brees fell off those two weeks. Now, they don't even have him. Granted, Shaun Hill would have been a better start the past two games, but he's not going to blow up for 48 points. Prediction: Marion Barber is going against KC which will be enough for a Sporks win.

Last week: 0-0
For the year: 4-6