Sherman Tanks vs. The Hellhounds
You're kidding, right? The Hellhounds haven't been within single digits of a win since week 3. They aren't the Tampa Bay Bucs of the TRU Fantasy Football League. They're worse. They got nothing. Prediction: Phil should shave his head in shame. Plus, it would be funny.
I'm not sure who the worst team in the NFL is anymore. It should be Tampa, but they won so we won't have a winless team this year. I think pound for pound, it's Washington. They've got two wins, but they were by 2 to St. Louis and 3 to Tampa. Both were at home. They've also lost to Detroit and Kansas City. That gives them my vote. But by the end of the year, it could be Oakland.
No Talent Ass Clowns vs. Waived & Confused
The real Toilet Bowl as the Jo(h)ns duke it out. Johns? Toilet Bowl? Get it? But with only one game separating them, it's a big game. Both teams are coming off a loss but Waived is coming off three straight. And Waived could be in trouble relying on a bunch of Bengals and Jay Cutler while the Clowns have Brett Favre facing the Lions. Prediction: Jon thinks he can win with a bunch of Bengals facing the Steelers? Is he insane?
Speaking of the Bengals, it was a funny idea for Chad Johnson to try to bribe the refs. However, the $20K fine was well deserved. I think the NFL does try too hard to stifle fun, but after that NBA ref went to jail for trying to fix games, the NFL needs to crack down on any insinuation that their refs could be on the take. Too many paranoid people out there already think they are. You don't want to feed that.
Dark Lords vs. Meat Curtains
Meat is 8-1 with some of the luckiest matchups. Five wins by fewer than 10 points. However, their last (and only) loss was to the Dark Lords. Will it happen again? Maybe. Maybe not. The Dark Lords had a midseason surge to get above .500 but have lost two straight. Even worse are some of the matchups that definitely favor Meat. Ray Rice versus Cleveland. Ronnie Brown versus Tampa. While the Dark Lords have Aaron Rodgers (and his shitty offensive line) facing Dallas. Prediction: Have to take the Meat Curtains matchups.
I watched a lot of college teams running the "Wildcat" formation yesterday, and it seemed like most were failing. UK actually runs it better than most, but the reason for that is they put Randall Cobb back there. Obviously, you should run it better when you put your best quarterback in that position. If this formation is so good, why is that the NFL team that runs it the best is Miami and they're 3-5?
Spooner St. Sporks vs. Lonmunu
The Sporks finally get back in the win column. Can they do it for a second week? In a word, yes. Lonmunu certainly has some advantages especially Adrian Peterson facing Detroit. However, they've also got DeAngelo Williams and Roddy White both questionable which may limit what they can do even if they play. Oh, and the Sporks have Drew Brees and Pierre Thomas going against St. Louis. Prediction: Take the Sporks.
I saw someone claiming that Minnesota was still better than New Orleans. Not sure why. Minnesota got beat by Pittsburgh and should have lost to San Francisco and Baltimore. Minnesota is better than they were last year, but not a ton. A lot is at the margins. They went 10-6 last year with Tavaris Jackson who is atrocious. They still have that good defense, good O-line and Adrian Peterson. Now they're winning some of those games they let go at the end. But Pittsburgh showed that if you do a good job containing Adrian Peterson, Minnesota won't win passing 50 plus times a game.
Los Bastardos vs. They Might Be Daves
I just have a feeling Daves running game will be good this week. Just a gut feeling. Prediction: They Might Be Daves.
That NFL Network game was a bore. Which I'm glad to see. I get tired of the NFL putting top games on their network while trying to overcharge for it and then whining to Congress to try to make cable companies put it on basic. Yet, not mentioning their shitty decision to only allow DirectTV to have the NFL full access package. So, I'm glad they got a garbage game this week.
For the year: 12-18
Sunday, November 15, 2009
Sunday, November 1, 2009
Week 8 PIcks and other NFL News
Fine. I'm back. At least this week.
Sherman Tanks vs. Lonmunu
Been some recent changes to Lonmunu. Maybe the biggest being that they used to be called Mooseknuckles. Now they're back to being the original team name Lonmunu. Which Ben once told me what that means but I can't remember. But it was probably less gay than Mooseknuckles. Probably. The other big change was trading Steve Slaton to get Adrian Peterson. And those extra four points per game. Not that those four points will be enough going up against the Mighty Sherman Tanks (best 4-3 team in the league). Sure, I could point to a lot of things. DeAngelo Williams being a poor complement to Peterson this week. Vincent Jackson facing the Raiders for the Tanks. But it comes down to one thing. Would you rather have Donovan McNabb or Peyton Manning? Prediction: Tanks have Manning. They'll win.
Speaking of McNabb, there was some irony last week. The controversy over Rush Limbaugh being a part of a potential ownership group brought back the whole issue from a few years back when Limbaugh said McNabb was overrated (completely accurate) because the media wants a black QB to do well (not the only reason he's overrated). The irony part? At the same time this is going on, McNabb gets a delay of game because he's trying to call a timeout that he doesn't have against the Raiders. A game they lose 13-9. So, he's not just overrated. He's rather stupid.
The Dark Lords vs. They Might Be Daves
Interesting game. The Lords are on a surge winning three while Dave has lost its last two. Should be a quarterback battle. Both teams have been led by quarterback play over the past few weeks. The reason that the Lords are winning and Dave is losing is simple. Dave has had good games by Matt Schaub and no one else. The Lords have had good games by Aaron Rodgers and Ben Roethlisberger, but they've also had another player step up. A different one every week in fact. This might be different. Frank Gore could have a good game against the Colts' shoddy run defense. But Schaub is facing Buffalo which doesn't give up a lot of yards through the air. Yet, Rodgers is facing Minnesota in a grudge match and sacked the shit out of him a few weeks ago. Prediction: I just can't see where that second player comes from for the Lords, but I think they get a better game from Rodgers than Schaub and someone gets that game. So, take the Dark Lords.
Speaking of Rodgers, has anyone heard that Brett Favre is making his first trip to Green Bay as a visitor? I can't believe how many people are acting like his behavior is no big deal. Well, it is. He hasn't just changed teams. He's burned bridges. I don't give two shits what he's said publicly. Favre jerked the Packers around hoping they'd cut him and let him sign with Minnesota. He didn't want to just leave. He wanted to go to the Vikings (good defense, good O-line, Adrian Peterson). That's the only place he really wanted to go. It's one thing for a superstar to change teams, but it's quite another to want to leave and be the missing piece for a conference rival. Emmitt Smith didn't go to the Redskins. And then to say things like how this Minnesota team is the best you've played on? Compared to your Super Bowl winning team? Retired NFL players can make a lucrative post-career living if they were stars, but usually only where they starred. When I went to Pittsburgh, you saw so much of Franco Harris that you assumed he was still playing. Unless he wins a Super Bowl, do you think Favre will be remembered as a "Vikings icon"? No, he won't. For all the hype, the Vikings are struggling to sell tickets for a team led by a man they hated for years. But by burning bridges with Packers' fans, he's probably ruined his chances for a postseason career there.
Los Bastardos vs. Spooner St. Sporks
The Sporks have certainly struggled of late. Like the last five weeks. After a 2-0 start, they haven't won since. But while they had a bad few weeks in the middle, they've actually scored well. Problem is that so have Los Bastardos. It's Drew Brees against Philip Rivers. Which could just be a sideshow. Rivers actually has more yards per game, but Brees counters with touchdowns. I think Rivers against Oakland is a better matchup but I still don't see much separation between the two which means the other players are key. The Bastards have Steven Jackson against Detroit. And Marques Colston negates some Brees advantage. The Sporks counter with Marion Barber against Seattle. And seven of nine players on either New Orleans or Dallas. With Dallas facing Seattle, that's not bad. New Orleans and Atlanta? Not as good. And having two New Orleans running backs could be a big problem. Prediction: Bastards keep the Sporks on a losing streak.
The Saints are one of the three undefeated teams so far this year. I'm not surprised since I picked them to make the Super Bowl at the FF draft. The Colts are also undefeated which isn't surprising since they do that a lot before choking in the playoffs. Then there is Denver. Did not see that coming at all.
Meat Curtains vs. Waived & Confused
Meat is certainly the surprise of the league with a 6-1 record. Having big games by Tom Brady and Andre Johnson isn't that surprising, but having them by Ray Rice and DeSean Jackson is a little bit more. But this week, they don't have Brady. Not sure Johnson, Rice and Jackson will will have very good weeks. And Waived has Matt Ryan in a potential shootout with New Orleans. But Waived has little else. Prediction: Meat keeps winning.
Ugh. Brad Childress decided to dress as a flight attendant to make his Vikings feel better after losing to the Steelers. Of course, that brings up the question of why a guy in drag makes the Vikings feel better, but I'll let that pass. I'll just say that Childress is a very homely man. He makes an even uglier woman.
No Talent Ass Clowns vs. The Hellhounds
The Hounds are still looking for that first win. Trading away top draft pick Adrian Peterson was a big move. Might work out this week since the Hounds got Steve Slaton in return and he's facing a very poor Buffalo run defense. Plus, he also got Kurt Warner who is going against Carolina and two players facing the Rams. Of course, those two players are with the Lions. Still, the Clowns do have something on their side. Tony Romo facing the Seahawks and Maurice Jones-Drew versus the shit Titans. But they also have a gimpy Reggie Wayne and don't have Brian Westbrook. Prediction: Hounds finally win.
The Titans are starting Vince Young this week because the owner wants them to. I'm a little surprised Jeff Fisher is doing it because he's winless and Young quit on the team once. I think Collins gives them the best chance to win. And while Fisher's resume is good enough to get another job as it stands. I don't think it's good enough if he goes winless. And they are in bad shape right now. The Titans have lost their last three games 127-26. Still, with Buffalo, St. Louis and Seattle left on the schedule, that's three games that wouldn't be huge upsets so I think with either quarterback, the Titans will win at least one game.
Sherman Tanks vs. Lonmunu
Been some recent changes to Lonmunu. Maybe the biggest being that they used to be called Mooseknuckles. Now they're back to being the original team name Lonmunu. Which Ben once told me what that means but I can't remember. But it was probably less gay than Mooseknuckles. Probably. The other big change was trading Steve Slaton to get Adrian Peterson. And those extra four points per game. Not that those four points will be enough going up against the Mighty Sherman Tanks (best 4-3 team in the league). Sure, I could point to a lot of things. DeAngelo Williams being a poor complement to Peterson this week. Vincent Jackson facing the Raiders for the Tanks. But it comes down to one thing. Would you rather have Donovan McNabb or Peyton Manning? Prediction: Tanks have Manning. They'll win.
Speaking of McNabb, there was some irony last week. The controversy over Rush Limbaugh being a part of a potential ownership group brought back the whole issue from a few years back when Limbaugh said McNabb was overrated (completely accurate) because the media wants a black QB to do well (not the only reason he's overrated). The irony part? At the same time this is going on, McNabb gets a delay of game because he's trying to call a timeout that he doesn't have against the Raiders. A game they lose 13-9. So, he's not just overrated. He's rather stupid.
The Dark Lords vs. They Might Be Daves
Interesting game. The Lords are on a surge winning three while Dave has lost its last two. Should be a quarterback battle. Both teams have been led by quarterback play over the past few weeks. The reason that the Lords are winning and Dave is losing is simple. Dave has had good games by Matt Schaub and no one else. The Lords have had good games by Aaron Rodgers and Ben Roethlisberger, but they've also had another player step up. A different one every week in fact. This might be different. Frank Gore could have a good game against the Colts' shoddy run defense. But Schaub is facing Buffalo which doesn't give up a lot of yards through the air. Yet, Rodgers is facing Minnesota in a grudge match and sacked the shit out of him a few weeks ago. Prediction: I just can't see where that second player comes from for the Lords, but I think they get a better game from Rodgers than Schaub and someone gets that game. So, take the Dark Lords.
Speaking of Rodgers, has anyone heard that Brett Favre is making his first trip to Green Bay as a visitor? I can't believe how many people are acting like his behavior is no big deal. Well, it is. He hasn't just changed teams. He's burned bridges. I don't give two shits what he's said publicly. Favre jerked the Packers around hoping they'd cut him and let him sign with Minnesota. He didn't want to just leave. He wanted to go to the Vikings (good defense, good O-line, Adrian Peterson). That's the only place he really wanted to go. It's one thing for a superstar to change teams, but it's quite another to want to leave and be the missing piece for a conference rival. Emmitt Smith didn't go to the Redskins. And then to say things like how this Minnesota team is the best you've played on? Compared to your Super Bowl winning team? Retired NFL players can make a lucrative post-career living if they were stars, but usually only where they starred. When I went to Pittsburgh, you saw so much of Franco Harris that you assumed he was still playing. Unless he wins a Super Bowl, do you think Favre will be remembered as a "Vikings icon"? No, he won't. For all the hype, the Vikings are struggling to sell tickets for a team led by a man they hated for years. But by burning bridges with Packers' fans, he's probably ruined his chances for a postseason career there.
Los Bastardos vs. Spooner St. Sporks
The Sporks have certainly struggled of late. Like the last five weeks. After a 2-0 start, they haven't won since. But while they had a bad few weeks in the middle, they've actually scored well. Problem is that so have Los Bastardos. It's Drew Brees against Philip Rivers. Which could just be a sideshow. Rivers actually has more yards per game, but Brees counters with touchdowns. I think Rivers against Oakland is a better matchup but I still don't see much separation between the two which means the other players are key. The Bastards have Steven Jackson against Detroit. And Marques Colston negates some Brees advantage. The Sporks counter with Marion Barber against Seattle. And seven of nine players on either New Orleans or Dallas. With Dallas facing Seattle, that's not bad. New Orleans and Atlanta? Not as good. And having two New Orleans running backs could be a big problem. Prediction: Bastards keep the Sporks on a losing streak.
The Saints are one of the three undefeated teams so far this year. I'm not surprised since I picked them to make the Super Bowl at the FF draft. The Colts are also undefeated which isn't surprising since they do that a lot before choking in the playoffs. Then there is Denver. Did not see that coming at all.
Meat Curtains vs. Waived & Confused
Meat is certainly the surprise of the league with a 6-1 record. Having big games by Tom Brady and Andre Johnson isn't that surprising, but having them by Ray Rice and DeSean Jackson is a little bit more. But this week, they don't have Brady. Not sure Johnson, Rice and Jackson will will have very good weeks. And Waived has Matt Ryan in a potential shootout with New Orleans. But Waived has little else. Prediction: Meat keeps winning.
Ugh. Brad Childress decided to dress as a flight attendant to make his Vikings feel better after losing to the Steelers. Of course, that brings up the question of why a guy in drag makes the Vikings feel better, but I'll let that pass. I'll just say that Childress is a very homely man. He makes an even uglier woman.
No Talent Ass Clowns vs. The Hellhounds
The Hounds are still looking for that first win. Trading away top draft pick Adrian Peterson was a big move. Might work out this week since the Hounds got Steve Slaton in return and he's facing a very poor Buffalo run defense. Plus, he also got Kurt Warner who is going against Carolina and two players facing the Rams. Of course, those two players are with the Lions. Still, the Clowns do have something on their side. Tony Romo facing the Seahawks and Maurice Jones-Drew versus the shit Titans. But they also have a gimpy Reggie Wayne and don't have Brian Westbrook. Prediction: Hounds finally win.
The Titans are starting Vince Young this week because the owner wants them to. I'm a little surprised Jeff Fisher is doing it because he's winless and Young quit on the team once. I think Collins gives them the best chance to win. And while Fisher's resume is good enough to get another job as it stands. I don't think it's good enough if he goes winless. And they are in bad shape right now. The Titans have lost their last three games 127-26. Still, with Buffalo, St. Louis and Seattle left on the schedule, that's three games that wouldn't be huge upsets so I think with either quarterback, the Titans will win at least one game.
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