Week 3 Predictions

After the first two weeks, I might want to reconsider this segment, but here goes.

Sherman Tanks vs. Sporks
Well, I think this is the obvious week that Drew Brees comes back to earth. Has to happen sometime. And besides, he can't do it all and the Sporks are starting two scrub running backs and some receivers who won't do much. Facing the Tanks with Peyton Manning in a potential shootout with Arizona. Michael Turner and Brandon Jacobs are against weak run defenses. Hines Ward has the Bengals who he loves to beat. Literally. I have to give the Tanks the edge at QB, running back, receiver and defense. Rob Bironas has a sore knee so the Sporks might be better at kicker. Prediction: There's no Andre Johnson here so Tanks win easily.

Mooseknuckles vs. They Might Be Daves
Sure Dave might be tied for first place, but he's the fifth highest scoring team. And only slightly above Mooseknuckles who they would have split with the first two weeks. One thing that stands out for me about Mooseknuckles is that they've got Kurt Warner and new receiver Larry Fitzgerald in that potential shootout with the Colts mentioned above. DeAngelo Williams could have a big game against Dallas, and Baltimore could have 8 sacks against Cleveland. Still, Dave has Matt Schaub against Jax and their bottom third pass defense. Clinton Portis and Matt Forte against Detroit and Seattle and their bottom third run defenses. Greg Jennings against St. Louis and Terrell Owens trying to keep up with the Saints. Frank Gore facing Minnesota is the only bad matchup. Prediction: Gotta go with Dave's matchups.

Dark Lords vs. No Talent Ass Clowns
Not sure what the Dark Lords are doing. Taking out Aaron Rodgers for Ben Roethlisberger when Rodgers is facing St. Louis. Especially since they traded for Donald Driver and put him in. And Roethlisberger is facing the defense Rodgers had trouble with last week. But Johnny Knox could do well against Seattle because Jay Cutler seems to like him. Fred Jackson is probably the X factor. He's playing well, but going against the Saints probably means few rushing attempts as the Bills may being playing New Orleans from behind, but he has done pretty good in passing game. But the Clowns have some good stuff too. Reggie Wayne against Arizona. Tony Romo may choke against Carolina, but should have good stats until then. Brian Westbrook against KC? Gold. Maurice Jones-Drew has Houston. Bet he's looking at that Chris Johnson tape from last week. Prediction: I don't think which quarterback the Dark Lords use matters. The Clowns will win.

Hellhounds vs. Waived & Confused
The Matt Hasselbeck experiment didn't last long. One broken rib changed that tune for the Hellhounds. So, now they get Carson Palmer facing the Steelers. Hmmmm. Good thing Adrian Peterson is a great running back because the 49'ers actually are pretty good against the run (but that was against Seattle and Arizona). Kevin Smith could do something against the Skins. I think Steve Smith has a big game. With Smith and Calvin Johnson, the Hounds match up well with Waived's receivers because I only see Randy Moss doing much. At running back, Ryan Grant might do something. Matt Ryan? Meh. Not sure. Prediction: I think the Hounds take this one.

Meat Curtains vs. Los Bastardos
I can't see Los Bastardos getting 47 points out of Chris Johnson this week. Of course, I can't see Meat getting a combined 54 points from Andre Johnson and DeSean Jackson. Ever again. Nor 26 from Ronnie Brown. The bigger problem is Tom Brady didn't look too good last week. I think he loses the QB battle to Philip Rivers. Ray Rice is probably going to keep losing carries to Willis McGahee so Brown may need 26 points this week. Johnson should be okay but 32 points is not likely. For Los Bastardos, Chris Johnson won't do that well against the Jets, but I think Steven Jackson does well against Green Bay. Ditto with Marques Colston against the Bills. Prediction: Kind of a tossup. I'll go with Los Bastardos.

Last week: 2-3
For the year: 4-6